Always the first..

These shots are from last year...

In 2009 they all had sports together..But today Hallie went off to her first senior school sports.. Milla and I turned up to check out the action and wouldn't you know it - she was wearing her school shoes! No runners! So as all good mothers do I turned around and drove all the way home and brought her runners back to her.. Probably won't help her win any events..She's not athletically inclined..BUT her smile was enough.. I sat with her while she sat in her house group to eat her lunch. She was all by herself..her friend was in another house..There were BIGGER kids everywhere..But I had to go..I had to get M home back to bed..Thankfully her second cousin Maddy..Came and sat with her..
But as I left, I was again struck by the issues faced by the oldest child. Doing everything first..It's a big ask really. Plus her younger siblings are twins. When they have to face these new and confronting situations they will always have one another.. And now that she is going to be the oldest of five..Well let's just say..The pressure I feel is being put on her, it was one of the major guilt issues I had with this pregnancy..I know she will be fine. But it tugs at my heart strings a little when I see her 'little self'dealing with new and strange situations, like today..
You have to content yourself with accepting what is and realising that all that she faces is moulding her into the adult she would become.